


taboo

by hachionee



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/M, Karasuno, Oblivious Kageyama Tobio
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:53:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27573394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hachionee/pseuds/hachionee
Summary: “I love you, Tobio.”She hoped for the wind that passed by to carry it for his ears to reach. Maybe hope that he heard her uttering those words full of deep, sincere love.But he didn’t.And even if he did, he would never understand the graveness of those words. He would never understand the level of her love for him.
Relationships: Brother/Sister
Kudos: 2





	taboo

**Author's Note:**

> The other day, I scrolled through my phone and came across a folder of drafts. I started reading them, curious of what I wrote a long time ago for I stopped writing for 2 years already. It was then that I found this, a draft, a 3-year old draft written by my 17-year old self wanting to satisfy a question:  
> "What if Kageyama has a twin sister who romantically loves him?"  
> So there. I thought it would be such a waste to leave it as a draft so, I decided to post it!

Kageyama Tobio has made himself known when he was still in middle school as King of the Court. He gained fame clearly because of hard work and sheer talent in the field of his sports – volleyball. Truly, his skills as a player aren’t something that should be taken for granted. This young lad has great potential that he even surpassed that of his senior and recognized _Setter of the Year_ , Oikawa Tooru.

Setting his volleyball skills aside, the lad is still well-known. In school, he had been recognized as the “ _kid who pushes two buttons angrily at the vending machine_ ” and the “ _genius in volleyball but dumb in academic_ s”. In their neighborhood, he has always been the “ _scowling awkward child_ ”. However, if you look closely, this young man is a looker. For his age, he is quite tall and muscular. He omits aura on and off the court, black hair has been cropped short, dark blue eyes, and his prominent feature as a male – his sharp glare.

For females who read too much shoujo manga or watched too many k-dramas, Kageyama is totally the type of guy who they would go for because of this bad boy vibe. But because this _bad boy_ is too unapproachable, no one was able to see how much of a softie he could be.

To the volleyball players, he’s a perfectionist who dictates what you do, hence the nickname: _King of the Court_. No one had seen him train with so much tenacity, with perseverance and persistence. The lad is a stubborn fool who does not know when to give up but knows what defeat is like the back of his hand. He is that dedicated to volleyball – with so much passion. Unbeknownst to all, Kageyama is a dork.

Kitako snorted.

“Is there something funny, Kitako-kun?”

She tensed at the mention of her name and sat properly on her chair. A sheepish smile curved its way on her lips as she faced her English teacher who has been eyeing her.

“Nothing, Ono-sensei. I was just daydreaming. Gomen.” She made sure that she looked sincere as she apologized, hoping for the teacher to let it pass – the fact that she admitted daydreaming and not listening to the discussion, that is. What she said gave it away and some of her classmates chuckled at her honesty.

Fortunately, Ono only narrowed her eyes before huffing. “Well then, please read the tanka on page 31.”

Kitako obliged and did as she was told after mumbling a hai. Standing up, her dark blue eyes scanned the pages quickly and recited the passage.

* * *

The sound of the bell ringing echoed throughout the school as it implies it is lunchtime already. Murmurs of _arigatougozaimasu_ and echoed footsteps on the marble-floored hallway mixes to create a noise of what seemed to be the break the students always looked forward to. The doors of the first-year classrooms opened and soon enough, their hallway is filled with their year.

Kitako took her time to clean her desk, putting away her notes and pencil case before pulling out her bento wrapped in blue cloth. A petite blonde-haired approach her table, holding her own wrapped bento with a smile.

“What were you daydreaming about, Kitako-chan?”

She looked up and smiled, unwrapping the cloth. “Ah, Yacchan.”

Kitako let the newcomer settle down first, sitting down on the chair in front of her that was supposed to be facing the board. Yacchan, too, unwrapped her bento.

“I’ve been thinking about Tobio.”

She admitted. Her gaze glanced at the sky outside the window. It hovers and governs the earth with its blueness that it reminded her of one thing – Kageyama’s eyes. She must’ve been looking crestfallen that when Kitako faced her friend, she received the same gaze from her friend’s light brown eyes. Yachi Hitoka usually wears a cheerful expression but the face her friend is pulling off right now has slapped Kitako another realization.

_How pitiful._

“But not the bad ones, alright.” Kitako assured. She sighed, feeling melancholic as time passes by. “I’ve been thinking of how we were as a child. But I’m alright. All good.”

“Are you sure?” Yachi questioned, her eyebrows narrowed at her with disbelief. If only the topic of their conversation isn’t that _sorrowful,_ she would jump in surprise at the display of her friend.

Defeated, Kitako murmured. “Yes.” _I will be._

The topic ended when the two decided to eat before lunchtime is over. It isn’t over for Kitako, though. As soon as she opened her own bento, she is greeted by rice, tamagoyaki, edamame, and meatballs. Not too fancy, she must say, but it proves enough that she can fend for herself as Kitako prepared her own bento no matter the day. But this is not about her, it’s about him – Kageyama Tobio.

With metal chopsticks in hand, her mind raked over the days she would share her own bento with the lad. How her mother would prepare two bento boxes each day with love – one for her and one for Kageyama. As she swallowed, her mind drifted to that day wherein Kageyama was the center of the fuss on the first-year hallway. It was the day when he received a bento from someone else – from another girl.

_I wonder what he’s eating right now?_

It should not matter to her anymore. The bento box itself was proof that it contains nutritional values the lad needs every day. The satisfied look plastered on his face gave it all away that the food is great. Therefore, whoever she is, she is a great cook.

_Maybe even better of a cook than I am._

Kitako frowned to herself. Her insecurity is once again kicking in. She felt sorry for herself, honestly. She didn’t share the same class with Kageyama as he is in Class 1-3. But she was there when he first received his bento. She was outside his class, about to call his name and ask that they should eat their lunch together. However, she wasn’t able to. Kitako ended up holding two bento box and dejectedly watched how this boy named Harukaze Suzaku approach Kageyama and said,

_“Onee-san asked me to give it to you. Told me she promised she’ll give you lunch but she’s currently in the club as we speak. “_

She.

Who is the _she_ the foreign-looking lad is referring to has been a mystery to Kitako.

Unlike Yachi sitting in front of her, she does not have any connections to any of the higher years. Kitako didn’t find the necessity to apply to a club or any extracurriculars as going to the same school as Kageyama Tobio is enough. Of course, it was a big deal to her. She has done things in order to remain on the same radar as Kageyama Tobio. Her and Kageyama in the same school? That was her man-made luck. But her and Kageyama in the same class? Heavens did not agree with her and she is placed in a different class with different expectations.

Call her paranoid but Kitako is. She would never admit to anyone that she is insecure to the she – she who has been giving Kageyama home-made lunch every day, she who apparently has been stealing Kageyama’s attention intentionally or not, she who is from the higher year and she, who apparently has good genes, by the reason of Harukaze Suzaku’s good-looking hafu appearance.

To make matters worse, she shares the same class with this Harukaze Suzaku. As if the deities on the heavens above have been giving her reminder that there is the _she_ that exists in their midst.

Kitako closed her bento box, already had her fill with her lunch. A murmur of thank you and a close-lipped smile to Yachi was what she did before she packed her things. She failed to notice the doleful look on Yachi’s face for she knew. And Kitako does not need her sentiments.

Yachi, being the curious lady she is, learned about what’s her deal with Kageyama. Thankfully enough, her friend decided to close her lips shut, and not a word was uttered to anyone else.

Her long legs brought her to the hallway, passing by different personalities that lingered. Her black hair swayed behind her back, reaching almost her waist, as she took her stride. Painful and agonizing, she took a peek at the room of Class 1-3 as she passed by it. She didn’t find any scowling face but an empty table and chair.

Without a word, she continued on her journey. Her dark blue eyes surveyed her surroundings, carefully searching for the same pair of hues even as she went down the stairs. She has reached the library but found no mop of black hair snoring. She has reached the cafeteria but found no King arguing with ginger.

Kitako grumbled to herself. Of course, it is common sense. Kageyama didn’t visit the library often and has not been buying lunches in the cafeteria anymore. Of course, he wouldn’t be there. Moving on, she decided on her stop. She was about to make a turn, to the place where the King of the Court was born when she found who she was looking for.

“How did you fare?”

And of course, he wouldn’t be alone.

“Fine.” she heard Kageyama, so she hid on the door between their world. She heeded.

“Define _fine,_ Tobio-kun.”

Kitako’s ears hurt.

Long ago, when Yachi was recruited to be the manager of the men’s volleyball team, Kitako thought that it’s okay because _it’s_ Yachi. They’re friends and didn’t found the girl a threat to her and Kageyama. In fact, she’s grateful that the girl agreed to be their tutor when they flunked their exam before. On a normal occasion, Kitako would be jealous of the attention the blonde petite was getting for long before Kageyama became known, she was the one who tutored him, but she didn’t anyway. The girl was too sweet and precious to be the reason for her irrational jealousy.

She truly will not admit to anyone that she is jealous of the girl he’s speaking to right now when she learned that the same _she_ has been tutoring Kageyama now. And that, she called him by his first name!

It irks her.

She used to be one of the few who are able to call him by his first name. Aside from Oikawa-san, as well, of course. As far as what she heard from Yachi, no one in the team calls him by his first name. It’s always _“Kageyama”_ and some nicknames to annoy the lad. But she, _she_ called him Tobio. She uttered his name with obvious affection, one of the things Kitako wasn’t able to do anymore.

The girl has the same black hair, only shorter for it ends on her chin. It showcases her long, fine neck. Her eyes screamed blue, bright it may seem which appears greenish when hit by the rays of the sun. Her smile is contagious and her face is gentle. A petite body that screamed woman and tall frame that she almost shares the same height as Kageyama. Like Harukaze Suzaku, she looks foreign as well, despite the Japanese vibes she’s emitting. Is it Russian? Still, she is an embodiment of natural beauty and she looked mature for her age.

She irks Kitako.

From the way Kageyama scowled at what she said, slowly turning into a pout to the way he gazed at her with gentle – crushes Kitako’s heart.

“I passed. Barely.”

And the girl lovingly messed his hair with what seemed to be a dorky grin plastered on her cute face. “See? If you put an effort into it, you’ll get used to it.” Kageyama just grumbled as she now settled on fixing the mess she did.

“That’s different.”

“Different, you say? You’re just selecting which to memorize and I’m not surprised that you chose hand signals over pronouns. Sure, that’s different.”

“Sawako-san.” He rolled his eyes and Sawako, Kitako finally learned, giggled.

She can cook. She is good-looking. She’s on a club – the vice-president at that. Aside from basic public information, Kitako does not know anything about the girl.

But she can make him smile.

Kitako had never seen such a wonderful curve on the lad’s face since entering junior high school. She felt ashamed of herself for eavesdropping. She felt hurt at the same time, as he never smiled like that before. She felt detached, somehow, that he is not the Kageyama Tobio she knew and grew up with fondly. He was short-tempered, maybe rash and violent when a situation calls for it but lately, Kageyama mellowed down.

Standing behind the metal doors, Kitako stared at the two. Kageyama Tobio and Harukaze Sawako looked good together. Her eyes stung for incoming tears as she thought of such, for who wouldn’t? They both stood tall, Sawako is just inches shorter, and they’re both good-looking. He’s cute and she’s pretty.

_Ah._

Kitako is insecure and it hurts her.

Harukaze Sawako.

Kitako decided. She’ll forever remember that name. Not to hunt her down, not to stalk her either but a reminder. For Harukaze Sawako is so much more than her hafu look.

_She cooks him his lunch._

_She makes him smile._

_She calms him down._

_She tutors him, making sure he’s getting better on his academics._

A tear escaped her eye.

_She might as well, teach him how to love._

And another rolled down on her cheek.

_And he might love her the same._

Behind the metal door, Kitako hastily wiped the traitorous tears that shed. Her dark blue eyes glanced once more at the couple, who by now, decides to buy on the vending machine near where they at.

Kageyama Tobio and Harukaze Sawako.

A small laugh escaped her lips. It’s funny how their names sound good together. But her face turned grim.

“Unlike mine.”

It was in grade school when she started liking Kageyama for who he is. Kitako thought it was normal because why not? Kageyama was likable even if he looks scary back then. They were children – she was just a child. When they reached middle school, she learned that what she had with Kageyama is not right. But it didn’t matter to her, for her feelings were too deep to be considered as infatuation. She knew that she’s in love with him.

Even now. She still does.

“I love you.” She whispered. Her dark blue eyes glazed with tears. Some rolled down on her cheeks as she remained unmoving by the door and unseen by the two. “I love you, Tobio.” She hoped for the wind that passed by to carry it for his ears to reach. Maybe hope that he heard her uttering those words full of deep, sincere love.

But he didn’t.

And even if he did, he would never understand the graveness of those words. He would never understand the level of her love for him.

_It'll be fine, Kitako._

And so, she looked away.

_It's fine. That's alright._

Long before anyone from the building could wonder why a girl like her is standing behind the door, crying herself to the wind as if there’s a filming of the drama club going on, Kitako walked away. Away from the pair of black hair and blue eyes that reciprocates the same feelings. No one knows if the two known it by now, but to the others, there is love that blooms between them.

She left. Because Kitako knew that should she stay there, they would notice her soon and would lead them to question her as to why has been crying. She might be exposed. And it would be terrifying. She does not want anyone to know what she truly feels for the boy, including the boy himself. Tobio must be spared of her feelings.

"It hurts." She gasped for air. Her hand clutched at the chest, desperately clenching at her heart to rip its pain away while the other hold on the wall by the stairs.

How many times has she been preparing for the day she’ll learn that Kageyama’s heart is with someone else? She could still remember the days she’ll easily get jealous of any with female reproductive organs, scared that they might steal him from her without her knowledge.

How long has it been since she learned of Harukaze’s existence and has been hurting? Kitako isn’t deaf nor blind. She heard of rumors that circulate the whole school, and she has seen enough that she did not want to see it again.

She already knew. To love someone without being loved in return hurts. A lot. To love someone knowing that there's a huge zero hanging on top of his head for him to recognize her hurts. A lot.

But to love your own twin brother who already loves someone else and will never feel the same way she romantically did, hurts.

More than a lot.


End file.
